Member-only story

This Should Happen Before You Ever Say “I Love You”

A lesser-known indicator of true love.

Ariana E.
4 min readOct 10, 2021
Photo by Rosie Ann from Pexels

The first time my (now) boyfriend got genuinely upset with me, the first question out of my mouth was:

“Do you still love me?”

At that moment, I was afraid that he might have stopped. I was afraid that during this unpleasant conversation, he might have decided he was wrong about his feelings for me.

He immediately said, “yes, of course, I do” and moved on to continue the conversation. A rush of relief went through me.

I remember this experience distinctly because my boyfriend and I didn’t exactly follow the very recommendation I am about to share.

Before you tell someone that you love them, you should have at least one bad fight.

I said it. One bad fight.

I don’t mean a physical altercation or a bout of harsh name-calling.

I mean a disagreement that was so bad that it made you question whether or not this is the right relationship for you. Or, an unpleasant conversation that results in tears from one (or both) of you. A challenge that makes you question whether or not you really do love the other person.

--

--

Ariana E.
Ariana E.

Written by Ariana E.

I said what I said. Counter-cultural opinions on sex, love, and dating.

Responses (3)